Apr 28, 2020
TITLE
Being Real and Normalizing Our Human Experience
GUEST
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC
EPISODE OVERVIEW
What if we believed that we don’t always have to have our stuff together? The more real we can be, the more it allows others to be real. We need to normalize suffering, so we don’t think something is wrong when we are not constantly feeling exuberant. We can accept that wounding happens. Misunderstandings and miscommunications are part of the human experience. How do we embrace our feelings and not be wrong?
HIGHLIGHTS
- I want to break the shame and normalize having deep feelings
- I want to change the narrative around what may be labeled as unacceptable feelings
- We as therapists, often have shame that we have human experiences because we’re supposed to be “past” that
- Human life is a struggle
- If we’re wobbling, we freak out
- The more real we can be as therapists and healers, the more it benefits our clients
- We want to be mindful and intentional about self-disclosure in that it benefits the clients, and it’s not to meet our own needs
- We can do reality checks with clients if we self-disclose to see if it’s helpful
- How do we embrace our feelings and not be wrong?
- We need to accept that wounding happens
- We need to normalize suffering
- We want to ameliorate the suffering and know that wounding happens
- Sometimes we can over identify with the wound or live from the wound
- Misunderstanding and miscommunications are part of the human experience
- Good enough parenting—we just need to show up 30% of the time
- The Goddess of Never Not Broken
- She knows that she recreates herself every day
- She doesn’t have this expectation that she has it all together
- We don’t want to live our lives as nouns—in a constant state
- We want to live our lives as verbs, which is constantly changing
- We will bound back between the 2 states and accept the wounding
- PARTS Work or Internal Family Systems with Richard Schwartz
- We have a relationship with that part of you
- A part can despair
- We want to be self-led—which is soul, substance, clear and calm, compassionate
- When we get triggered or activated, a part takes over
- A part of the person is buying into that narrative of wounding
- How do you feel about the part?
- I feel bad for this part
- We can act from that part
- Being in it
- We can speak for that part
- A part of me feels…a part of me wants to …
- Healing comes from being in relationship with others who are doing their work
- There is power in being seen and heard and having someone who can hold space for us
- We often don’t know what’s possible if we haven’t experienced healthy relationships, so we recreate relationships that don’t work because we’re trying to work out something from the past
GUEST BIO
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC has been a psychotherapist for 20 years. She specializes in helping Highly Sensitive People thrive in love, work, and parenting Highly Sensitive Children. Jen is passionate about using mindfulness and compassion-based approaches to ameliorate human suffering.
PODCAST HOST
Patricia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and Coach. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, truthteller and black sheep. Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation and a sense of self-compassion. She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other HSPs know that they aren’t alone, and that being an HSP has amazing gifts, and some challenges. Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for HSPs that focus on understanding what it means to be an HSP, self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors us
LINKS
Jen’s links
Jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com
215-292-5056
Heartfulnessconsulting.com
Facebook.com/Heartfulnessconsulting
Richard Schwartz Internal Family Systems-- https://ifs-institute.com/about-us/richard-c-schwartz-phd
Susan David Ted Talk The Gift and Power of Emotional Courage--https://www.ted.com/talks/susan_david_the_gift_and_power_of_emotional_courage/transcript?language=en
Patricia’s links
Meetup--https://www.meetup.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-Meetup/events/268428586/
HSP Online Course--https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/hsp-online-groups/
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Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com
Meetup-- https://www.meetup.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-Meetup/
Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/
Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/
Closed/Private Facebook group for therapists and healers-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/208565440423641/
Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/
Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber
e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com
Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive
Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com